Day Thirteen...dark thoughts!

I didn't feel much like writing, so I put it off  and thought a lot about whether to write about what I was feeling.  The truth is that I prefer not to write about things that don't make me feel great...but this blog has been on my mind all week!  Earlier this week, I got 6 calls, back-to-back from my mom and one of my sisters.  When I picked up my phone and saw the missed calls, I knew that it wasn't going to be good news.  One of my former employees had died.  She was a sweet woman and my sister's closest friend. 

She was 35 years young:  compassionate, kind, hard-working, beautiful...She left seven boys behind.  She was next in line for a hard transplant.  She died of a stroke...  Her death is heavy on my mind because she was young, vibrant and full of life!  Although she had been ill, off and on, who knew that it would come to this...so soon?  Those seven young boys should not have to go through this at such a young age.  Her oldest son is headed to college.  Heading to college must be bittersweet for him.  I can't imagine what my first day of college would have been like without my mother's help.  I pray that he will go and that he will finish...

 Chene

An old wise tale is that death travels in threes--I can't say that I've ever been one to believe this, but I must say that the thought of it is a bit freaky!  I had been meaning to call and tell my friend Leah about Chene's death, but hadn't made the call...so when I saw that Leah was calling me on Thursday, I was happy to hear her voice and sad to share the news of Chene's death.  To my surprise, she was calling to say that she had lost her sister.  She was having a tough time dealing with her sister's death and just needed to talk.  I hope that I said something that made her feel better, but the truth is that all this talk of death was making me think too much about my own mortality and the thought of losing someone close to me.

I also thought about the chaos that often happens after someone dies.  My greatest wish is that when I die, no one fights about anything.  I've seen it all–whether to bury-where to bury- when to bury- whether there's insurance- who's paying for the funeral- who's mentioned on the obituary- what pictures to use, who gets to speak, who gets various personal items---OMG, the drama!  SO..........the question I keep asking myself is why don't do we a better job of preparing for death.  As I get older, I find myself turning into my mom,  I can remember when  someone would try to force her to do something–anything that she didn't want to do.  She would always say, "I don't have to do nothing but be black and die!"  She was right–those two things, she could never change...Yet, I know very few people that have actually planned for their death.

If you're reading this and thinking about my life ending any time soon, think again!  I know that God is not threw with me yet!   However,  I do realize that failure to plan on my part could constitute a huge headache for my family, especially my children.   Over the course of the next week, I'll be taking the necessary steps to make death as easy as possible for my family and friends.  After all, we never know who that third death will be... Stay tuned...